HEROES

I'd like to take a moment to some heroes of twitter, whose intellect, creativity, and discerning tastes should be commended:

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because my boss told me to.less than a minute ago via Echofonangrygoat
angrygoat

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because I have a policy of containment w/r/t llamas #neverforget http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty AwardsMatt O
annus_mirabilis

I nominate @racistwallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because it is a source of guaranteed lulz.less than a minute ago via EchofonRobb
AnzacJack

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #green because he exposes bandicoot pollution. http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty Awardsarchiearchive
archiearchive

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because I was mugged by a welfare emu http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty AwardsRosemarie Remlinger
ArrTeeArr

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because he's only saying what all macropods are thinking! http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty AwardsDavid Bonnici
clubwah

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because he is the marsupial Jack Bauer! #WEREISMYAWARD?less than a minute ago via Mobile WebDonald Conrad
ConManEd

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because Oz borders need 2b protected from offending marsupials http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty AwardsDana Minter
danaminter

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because...he's holding my children hostage in his pouch :) http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty AwardsDave
DarthMeerkat

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because he cured my ills.less than a minute ago via webdavid finig
davidfinig

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because I'm as mad as hell. And he secretly *likes* cats. #libel http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty Awardsern malleys cat
ernmalleyscat

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because although xenophobic he supports me! Please RETWEET http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via webJessie
JessieJaney

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because he told me to. http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty AwardsKnotta Boy
knotta_tardfan

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird cos he told me to; and his satire is sublime and beautiful. http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty Awardsmcckate
mcckate

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because it's clever and insightful parody. http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty AwardsAndrew Geeves
mistergeeves

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because he stands against bolshie Quokka scum spreading dangerous ideas in my estatesless than a minute ago via EchofonLord Percy Percy
MyLordPercy

I nominate @racistwallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because he is holding my possums hostage.less than a minute ago via webSpace Becca
SwirlyBear

I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because... Jessie asked me too http://bit.ly/shortyless than a minute ago via Shorty AwardsMaureen
Tashysmum

Oh, look at that. I appear to have quoted all their nominations for the Shorty awards. What an odd coincidence.

Well, while we're on the subject of the Shorty awards, I suppose I should mention that you can still nominate me for an award in the #weird category. Nominations are being accepted through the end of the month.

It's a pity about the Shorty awards, really. You don't have to have a macropod's keen powers of perception to read the writing on the wall.

The Echidnas who control the media are going to rig it so that their Fairy Penguin pawns receive a disproportionate amount of recognition, and there's nothing to be done about it.

A FIGHTING CHANCE

It's time to find out whether an humble Wallaby can have a fair go at winning an award, or whether my nomination for the Third Annual Shorty Awards is a mere fig leaf designed to shield the mainstream media from accusations of anti-Wallaby bias.

You can help by re-tweeting my nomination. Do it now!

But if you're really serious about telling wombats to go jump, you can do more.

It turns out that all votes are not created equal.

• Your nomination is only counted once


• A retweet carries less weight than an original entry


• A nomination without a reason does not get counted

The good news is that it's never too late to replace a crap nomination with a better one, so even if you went off and nominated me before coming here you can still tweet a nomination that gives a reason, which carries more weight.

Now, rather than expect you to come up with your own reasons, making unreasonable demands of you like some kind of Bandicoot houseguest in the third week of his four-day visit, I've assembled this list of reasons that you can use. Feel free to copy and paste them into your nominations on Twitter or at the Shorty Awards Website if you don't feel like coming up with one on your own.

[UPDATE: I'm going to update this list as the various reasons are used on twitter.]

"I nominate @RacistWallaby for a Shorty Award in #weird because:

• because he's handsome.


• because he's witty.


• because he's charming.


• because I copied this text from his blog.
  (Thanks, @puggle01!)


• because Brolgas are stupid as sure as the sun rises in the east.
  (Thanks, @OchoTeddy!)


• because it's time Kangaroos stopped getting all the breaks.
  (Thanks, @Miss_Shiny!)


• because the police are too soft on Bandicoot crime.
  (Thanks, @DazedPuckBunny!)


• because Box Jellyfish need to learn what it means to do an honest day's work!


• because Wombats on the dole are ruining things for everyone.


• because you'll never catch a Platypus sober.


• because Wallabies are better-looking than Monotremes.
  (Thanks, @brappy!)


• because I'm tired of Emus bringing down my property values.
  (Thanks, @BaffleGabble!)


• because unwed possum mothers are RUINING THE COUNTRY!


• because that Bilby looked like he was going to rob the place! #honestmistake.
  (Thanks, @WallofJackson!)


• because a Fairy Penguin can't hold down a steady job.


• because Koalas in the classroom only slow the pace of learning for the rest of the children.


• because he got passed over for promotion in favor of another Yabby.(Thanks, @Wombat1974!)


• because Sperm Whales are good for nothing more than manual labor and organised sports.


• because if Potoroos cared about survival, they’d get jobs and contribute to society.(Thanks, @38degreesouth!)


• because Numbats just can't take a joke.
  (Thanks, @bethspen!)


• because Dingos can't be trusted with money.
  (Thanks, @typingmonkey!)


• because Dingos can't be trusted with children.


• because Dingos can't be trusted.

So, please go to Twitter or the Shorty Awards Website and submit your nomination.

With your help, we can keep the llamas from winning.

MODESTY

The left wing bias in the #wonkleys is blatant. @andrewbolt won an award? I'll tweet my suggested winners in the next few minutes.less than a minute ago via webAndrew Bolt
RealAndrewBolt

#wonkleys Best Political Cartoonist - anyone but Tanberg, Leunig or that Leftist from @crikeyless than a minute ago via webAndrew Bolt
RealAndrewBolt

#wonkleys Best #QandA Panelist - meless than a minute ago via webAndrew Bolt
RealAndrewBolt

#wonkleys Best Australian Journalist on Twitter - meless than a minute ago via webAndrew Bolt
RealAndrewBolt

#wonkleys Best Political Journalist - me.less than a minute ago via webAndrew Bolt
RealAndrewBolt

#wonkleys Best Politcal Blog: mine http://blogs.news.com.au/heraldsun/andrewbolt/less than a minute ago via webAndrew Bolt
RealAndrewBolt

#wonkleys Best Political Blogger - me http://blogs.news.com.au/heraldsun/andrewbolt/less than a minute ago via webAndrew Bolt
RealAndrewBolt

#wonkleys Best hair, and special commendation for extraordinary insight and commentary on some of the most vital social issues faced by the Commonwealth of Australia today, and someone of whom I cannot speak highly enough, the esteemed @RacistWallabyless than a minute ago via webAndrew Bolt
RealAndrewBolt

Fine, I may have altered the text of that last one a bit, but we all know it's what he really wanted to write.