CORRECT

Dolphins are basically the arseholes of the ocean. They turn on the cuteness to get sympathy from humans http://bit.ly/9aYwO7less than a minute ago via webKayakTheGibbon
KayakTheGibbon

I never thought I'd agree with a poo-flinging freeloader like Kayak, but I suppose even a stopped clock is right twice a day. If there's anything in the oceans more obnoxious than dolphins, I haven't seen it.

Take Moko for example:

Moko, a solo bottlenose dolphin, has spent the past three years swimming with people on New Zealand's North Island east coast.

He typically pushes them out to sea on surfboards, even leaving one woman stranded on a sea buoy when he stole her surfboard.

He has also overturned kayaks, tipped over water skiers and even interfered with surf lifeguard training.

Bloody Delphinidae. If there's one thing that goes right up my nose, it's those wretched marine mammals acting like they own the entire ocean.

SHAMELESS

Now I can't go to sleep! I'm afraid of being attacked in the night by a bum-faced gibbon!less than a minute ago via webMr Shuffles
MisterShuffles

Nothing could possibly be more redundant than the phrase "bum-faced gibbon," but I think that @MisterShuffles still makes a valid point.

Gibbons are nothing more than graceless thugs who traffic in threats and intimidation. Worse yet, they delight in picking on the weak and vulnerable.

Imagine, scaring a defenceless Elephant like that. Don't they know that Elephants are already half afraid of their own shadows? Scaring them is like kicking the crutches out from under an invalid. Funny for a moment, but then the complaint letters start rolling in.

SHUFFLES FOR PM

#FF Look, when @mistershuffles becomes Prime Minister, I think we will all agree that racism in this country is over.less than a minute ago via HootSuiteRacist Wallaby
RacistWallaby

Shuffles for PM! That’s my opinion, if you were wondering.

Incidentally, I am shocked and disappointed to hear the rumours that I am only endorsing @MisterShuffles because my position as foreign minister in his cabinet would give me sweeping powers to crack down on Gibbons and other undesirables.

So shocked, in fact, that I shall decline to address them.