OPINIONATED

Dear @RacistWallaby, I would be interested in your opinion of this: http://bit.ly/iiUOC2. Yours Sincerely, Annasonic.less than a minute ago via web Favorite Retweet Replyanna
annasonic

Hmm. What is my opinion of the Wombat Hilton, where "Sixteen wombats loll about under the care of retirees Manfred and Helen Heide"?

My opinion of it is that these sort of establishments, well-intentioned as they may be, are doing grave harm to the Wombat community. Shelters like this for "orphaned and injured" wombats only encourage them to engage in risky behaviour to sustain injury that they can capitalise on, or — in extreme cases — incite them to patricide. Well, matricide, mostly, since Wombat fathers are notorious deadbeats who refuse to help raise their children.

I'm sure that Aidan McLindon agrees with me when I say that these sorts of facilities need to encourage Wombats to go back to the wild and stop subsisting on handouts. The Dreamworld theme park in Queensland is having similar problems with bludging wombats, specifically with Coco, its own Wombat welfare queen:

"She's basically a big fat wombat who loves her tucker," park curator Julia Leonard said. "She's a bit of a sook really"

Personally, I think it's a flaw in their genetic makeup that compels them to look for the easy way out and avoid doing real work.

Why, just this past Anzac day, While we were celebrating our brave diggers and their heroic contributions to this great nation's history, they were watching Private's Progress and taking notes on better ways to rort the system.

Dedicated "to all those who got away with it," indeed!